The Top Golf Stinks Blog Posts of 2011!

So it's the end of December and 2012 is right around the corner. But before we pop the bubbly and don our party hats tomorrow night, we here at the Golf Stinks blog would like to thank our readers for their continued support!

And to do that, we're going to carry on with the tradition we started two years ago: It's time to reveal our top ten posts of 2011 (based on page hits)!

Number 10

The Beginning of the End to my Golf Season - In September, Stinky Golfer Chris explains why the start of the NFL season pretty much marks the end of his (as well as many others') golf season.

Number 9

Golf Course Bankrupt? Blame Tiger Woods - Way back in January, Stinky Golfer Greg pondered why more and more golf courses are going belly-up these days and is led to conclude it's all Tiger's fault!

Number 8

Analysis: What Makes a Golf Course Great - In March, we revealed the analysis results of our "What Makes A Golf Course Great" survey. The results may surprise you!

Number 7

Don't Dress Like a Fool on the Golf Course - In this April guest post from Joe Sponcia over at Pillars of Golf, you will learn how not to dress for a round of golf!

Number 6

Why Golf is Aggravating - In this "reality bites" post, Stinky Golfer Pete comes to the frustrating conclusion that average hacks will always be average hacks.

Number 5

Variations on the Game of Golf - Project Flogton - In his continuing series on alternate versions of golf, Stinky Golfer Chris explores the cheating interesting format of Project Flogton.

Number 4

Does Golf Apparel and Equipment Fuel the "Rich Man's Sport" Stereotype? - Stinky Golfer Chris tackles one of the biggest stereotypes in the game - that you have to be rich to play golf. He suggests that merchandise retailers (and their marketing efforts) aren't helping.

Number 3

Why Do Non-Golfers Play in Golf Tournaments? - In this post from August, Stinky Golfer Chris ponders why people who rarely play golf, play in golf tournaments - could it be the food?

Number 2

5 Reasons Why They Hate Golf - In July, Stinky Golfer Greg provides his explanations as to why some people just don't appreciate this game we know and love.









And receiving the most page views in 2011...

Number 1

10 Golf Etiquette Rules Most Jackasses Ignore - In this April post, Stinky Golfer Greg lists his biggest golfer pet peeves in a no-holds-barred rant about cell-phone use; playing from the wrong tee-box; and giving unwanted swing advice.


So there you have it; our top posts of 2011! Thanks again to all our readers - without average hacks like you, golf just wouldn't be the same!

Best wishes for 2012!

-The Golfstinks Team

Related Posts:
The Top Golf Stinks Blog Posts of 2010!
The Top Golf Stinks Blog Posts of 2009!

Happy Holidays To Our Fellow Stinky Golfers!

The holidays are great. But the holidays are exhausting as well. Everyone agree? The running around. The hustle and bustle. The last minute everything! Sometimes you can feel like you need a vacation from being on vacation! Like you need to get back to work in order to get some rest!

Well honestly, it's no different for us here at golfstinks either. Stinky golfers Greg, Pete and myself all work to consistently put up whatever content we can. Be it informative, comical, sarcastic or just plain off-the-wall...we're doing the best we can to keep it comin' year round.

Obviously, we do things a little different around here. As you all know by now, we're not really covering/following the tours. We're not reviewing equipment. And we're certainly not trying to give you any swing advice! Lord knows none of us are qualified to do any of these things! But that also doesn't keep us from going on about the game we love. We just do it from the standpoint of your average, everyday hack. And believe it or not...that's not as easy as it sounds! Especially when all of us are working regular full-time jobs, raising kids, maintaining a relationship, family, home, etc. Or, all of the above!

Hence the need for a break/vacation. And friends, that's exactly what we're doing right now. We've been running around like chickens with our heads cut off for the past few days. So much so that we're among those people who need to get back to work in order to get some rest! So until Friday, we're not going to say a thing about golf except to say...

Happy holidays to all of our fellow golfers...stinky and non-stinky! We thank you for your continued support! And don't forget...

Swing 'til you're happy!

Golf Clubs?! I Got Your Golf Clubs Right Here...Merry Christmas!

In my post a couple weeks ago, I broke some balls about getting fitted for clubs. It was an attempt at being funny about shooting poorly and blaming it on the clubs. I know, I know...I won't quit my day job. Comedy's not my schtick. All jokes aside though, having a set of clubs that you are comfortable with definitely benefits your game. The only problem was that I had to figure it out the hard way.

Growing up with non-golfers, my only exposure to the game consisted of maybe catching Watson, Norman, Strange or Stewart on TV for a hole or two on Sunday afternoon. Oh, wait...I can't forget my mother's cousin, Vincenzo from Jersey, who traveled around with a nine iron in the trunk of his Lincoln Continental. Never quite understood that...nor do I want to. Nevertheless, that little taste of golf was enough to spark a curiosity. The problem was, how do I get started in this game?

Enter Stinky Golfer Greg. He pretty much gave me my first set of clubs. You see, if I asked for a set of clubs for Christmas...well...read the title. Basically, I was on my own. Fast forward 12 years or so and I'm glad it worked out this way. You don't want someone who has never played golf to buy you clubs. Especially me, I'm a lefty. And Greg just happened to have a left-handed friend who bought a new set a few years earlier, but he wasn't using them. That made all the difference for me. Instead of a mix-match set of garage sale clubs, I had a complete set of cavity backs.

Now, in the beginning, your clubs might not make a difference, but as your game develops they will. I'm not saying you have to spend a fortune on clubs, but if you are going to play on a regular basis, I would consider investing in a set and not necessarily settling for a set. Hey, it's the holiday season. Treat yourself or a loved one to the fine game of golf.

Hit'em long...yell Fore!!! Happy Holidays!

When Golf & Skiing Tied the Knot

As we push into late December, I'm constantly reminded (via radio, TV and billboard advertisements) that besides being the holiday season, it's also skiing season. Here in New England, the prime ski location is Vermont - and one such ski mecca in the Green Mountain State is a place called Okemo.

Okemo's advertisements are everywhere - images of snowboarders getting major air on a halfpipe or a family of four gliding cheerfully down a picturesque slope. But this excitement conjures up nada in me. Nope, when I hear the name "Okemo" I immediately think summertime and envision one of the top golf courses in Vermont.

In case you haven't guessed, I'm not a skier. I've never been skiing and have never really had any desire to attempt it. But the irony is, I've been to some awesome ski resorts. Let's take Okemo as an example - what was once a name only recognizable by skiers, now boasts several accolades...for golf:

Best Public Course in Vermont, 2006 Golfweek

Top 50 Courses in America, 2003 Golf For Women

Top Modern Club in Vermont, Golfweek

Best New Course in America nominee, Golf Digest

When you think about it, it makes sense to put a golf course at a ski resort. But what's interesting is golfing at ski resorts is a relatively new phenomenon. According to the April/May 2011 edition of Cigar Aficionado, turning a ski resort into a year-round attraction is big business - for both the resort and the surrounding towns:

All of the big ski resort operators such as Intrawest, Aspen Skiing Co., Vail Resorts and Boyne Resorts, along with many smaller peers, have turned their focus from selling lift tickets to selling real estate. To do this, they have had to offer more than just skiing. The new mountain town mantra is "lifestyle," and for more than a decade, once sleepy or even chichi ski towns have been busy repositioning themselves as year-round centers of sport and culture, building performing arts centers, sushi bars, bike trails, village centers, parks, ziplines and, most of all, golf courses.

To me this is extremely smart. Not just because of the obvious (that you can stay open year-round), but because I feel golfers and skiers are cut from a different cloth. Sure there may be some overlap, but for the most part, skiers are adventurers, while golfers are more pragmatic. Economically, this is a brilliant marriage, because the ski resort is not only reaching more people, but also reaching different types of people.

But the golfers have it slightly better (as the Cigar Aficionado article acknowledges):

[Ski towns] are famous around the globe and synonymous with luxury vacation hospitality, but even in ski season, most of their appeal and most of the time spent by visitors is off the slopes. All of these ancillary benefits, from fine dining to five-star lodging, can still be enjoyed in golf season, though without the crowds—and usually at much more reasonable prices.

And this is true - my experience playing at ski resort courses has always been great golf, at a great price, in a relaxed and quite atmosphere. Of course, as more people begin realizing these ski resort golf courses are out there, the more busy they will become.

But for now, the fact that these places have two very distinct atmospheres (depending on when you visit) will remain intact. For example, when you click on Okemo's website during the winter, you don't even realize they have a golf course! It's as if they're marketing department has recognized the two clientele are complete opposites.

Click on that same URL in the summer, and the golf course takes center stage. I've actually had conversations with skiers who mention Okemo and I'll say something like "Oh, I love Okemo!" And they'll look at me rather puzzled - they'll ask: "I thought you didn't ski?"

I guess the marketing is working.

Secret Santa Gifts For Golfers

Well, it's that time of year again...The time for last minute gift shopping. If you're like me, then every year you wait until the last possible minute to finish up your holiday shopping. And someone who almost always comes within mere hours of being left out in the cold is the person I've pulled for my Secret Santa.

Even as I write this, I am less than two days from my company's holiday party, and I have yet to purchase a gift for him. And to make it even a bit tougher on me...he's not a golfer! So I have no idea where to even begin. Ah, who am I kidding - he's getting a bottle of something. Only if this guy would take up golf, I'd have some great ideas for Secret Santa gifts.

If you've followed any of my previous posts regarding holiday gifts (A Few Golf Items Not Under My Tree and It's Christmas in July for Golfers) you'll see that some of my ideas were on the expensive side. But this time, I need to keep costs down due to our Secret Santa spending limit. Well that and I'm poor. But along with a gift from me comes a bit of my sense of humor. So lets just say, these gifts might not be for everyone. With that being said, lets start with this one:

Ah, the Potty Putter. Now that's a classic. For everyone who believes spending a little time on the ol' porcelain throne is quite the waste of time, then here's a great opportunity to turn it into quality time. Why not leave a scorecard along with it? Play a game with whoever follows you in? OK, maybe that's pushing it a little bit. But you know what's not? This:


What could go better with the potty putter than a roll of 19th hole bath tissue? I don't know about you, but sometimes you just need a little something fresh for the reading room. After all, it's called the reading room for a reason, no?

But what about something that your Secret Santa gift recipient could use out on the course? Well, how about this golf bag?

Now this looks like something quite convenient. A nice little pouch that could give you easy access to your balls. Sort of a ball bag for your golf bag. Nothing can intimidate another golfer more than carrying your balls on the outside. Why is everyone giggling? I don't get it.

OK, so the guy I have to buy for isn't a golfer, but maybe your stocking stuffer or Secret Santa recipient is. But not just a golfer - it has to be a golfer with a sense of humor. A golfer who would appreciate a bit of bathroom humor. Or someone who would just like the convenience of having a ball sack hanging off of their golf bag....oooohhhhh....I get it now. Funny stuff! In case anyone is reading this and has me for Secret Santa...see above.

Swing 'til you're happy!

Using Your Head At Golf...Literally

With the recent suspension of the Pittsburgh Steeler's James Harrison for that helmet-to-helmet concussion-inducing lick he dropped on the Cleveland Brown's QB Colt McCoy, it had me wondering about head injuries. Moreso, about the recent call to action for all sports to raise awareness to the severity of head injuries.

I remember when I was younger a lot of these injuries were passed off as a "stinger" or "you got your bell rung" when in fact these could have had traumatic long term effects. Surprisingly, golf also has its share of head injuries.

The following is an excerpt from research Golf Digest did on head injuries in golf:

Accidents often occur when golfers are fooling around. Most at risk are newcomers to the game, particularly children. In 1997, nearly 25 percent of all golf-related injuries occurred to children age 5 to 14. Even more striking, a recent study from Scotland reported that 40 percent of all sport-related head injuries among children were related to golf. Many of these injuries are caused not by golf balls, but by golf clubs, often as a result of kids playing with their parents' clubs at home.

This is not to mention, the ER sees about 40,000 golf injuries annually. On the bright side though, very rarely are these injuries fatal. Another interesting point is that Pro-Am tournaments turn out their fair share of injuries...but not to the golfers; On tour, it's the spectators who need to watch out. I can see it now, the gallery gathers around the tee box for Jim Furyk's drive but make the mistake of not moving when Jim's partner, Charles Barkley, tees off. The next thing you know, Sir Charles' ball is bouncing off onlookers' heads like a pinball machine. Good thing is you'll probably only make that mistake once.

All jokes aside, head injuries are very serious and I'm glad more attention is being brought to this issue. Having played a bunch of sports and having had "my bell rung" a few times I can tell you...it's not fun. So, the next time you're out on the course and your buddy takes one off of his melon, look for these tell-tale signs courtesy of the Mayo Clinic and get help immediately.

Loss of consciousness for a few seconds to a few minutes

No loss of consciousness, but a state of being dazed, confused or disoriented

Memory or concentration problems

Headache

Dizziness or loss of balance

Nausea or vomiting

Sensory problems, such as blurred vision, ringing in the ears or a bad taste in the mouth

Sensitivity to light or sound

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!! Use your head.

POLL: Is Golf Stuff On Your Holiday Wish List?

Every year around the beginning of December, my wife asks me what I want for Christmas. This year, I asked for a forged set of...wait for it...J.A. Henckles. In case you're not familiar with this German company, they make culinary knives, not golf clubs.

The funny thing is I'm not much of a chef. I do make a mean salsa, but it's not like I blog about my cooking skills. Golf, on the other hand, I do blog about. But the thought of asking her for golf clubs, or even something golf-related, never even crossed my mind.

To go a step further, I don't even remember a year in which something golf-related was on my wish list! I never really thought about it until now, but I guess much of this boils down to two reasons:

First, I'm very particular about what I buy myself for golf. I have to get certain clubs, certain balls, etc. But secondly, I guess I've always thought of golf as my personal hobby. My wife doesn't play golf. So when I make a golf-related purchase, it's something I've researched, tried-out and saved up for - it's never been something left up to others to get for me.

Thus, my Christmas list has always consisted of things like a new watch, or new shoes or forged knives - not golf stuff. Oh don't get me wrong, I've received golf gifts that I haven't asked for - some of which have been helpful, and others that have been, well, re-gifted (I've heard through the family grape-vine that I'm set to receive a telephone in the shape of a golf bag this December 25th from a cousin on my wife's side...I can hardly wait).

Anyway, what about you? Are you receiving fabulous golf gifts from your spouse while I'm too anal to even put them on my wish list? I don't know, but somehow, I feel as if I could be missing out.

Is Golf Stuff on your Holiday Wish List?

Oh No! I've Lost My Golf Hook-Up!

Doesn't everyone just love that guy/girl that's got your hook-up? You know, the one who can get you something from somewhere for free or cheap? Maybe it was something that...ah-ahem..."Fell off a truck." Or, when you ask where they came across this particular product, the response is "Don't worry about it...I got a guy." Who can't appreciate that?

When I was a kid, it was a few friends who worked at McDonald's, Dairy Queen and Dunkin' Donuts. As I got older, it turned into a buddy who was a mechanic. My wife even managed to find someone who just happens to come across inexpensive televisions. Nice! And speaking of my wife, I was even lucky enough to befriend a jeweler years ago. Boy I'll tell ya, you don't realize how badly you're getting screwed by a jewelry store until you bring them a diamond ring you purchased from a private jeweler and they tell you they would price it at almost three times what you paid! Now that's a hook-up!

But speaking of my wife, I'm not ashamed to say that I had been using her as a hook-up also. Thanks to her job in the golf industry, I've played golf courses for a fraction of the regular cost as well as purchased my custom-fit clubs for about half of what it would normally cost. However, that all appears to be gone now. In a move that, for several reasons had to be made, my wife quit her job in the industry and has decided to turn her part-time photography business into her full-time work.

While I of course wish her the best, I will certainly miss the hook-up aspect of the previous job. See, I didn't play a whole heck of a lot of golf this year. And of the few times I did manage to get out and play, it was at the benefit of my wife's hookups. So what am I going to do without her?

Of course, her new pursuit has already found me someone who has done my brakes for a great price. It's also found me an electronics repair guy who can hopefully save me a few bucks as well. Both are great hookups, but it's still not golf.

I'm worried that without the "hook-up motivation" I may not be out on the course any more next season than I was this one. So I guess we'll have to see what the off-season brings. You never know, maybe photography will bring her in contact with someone else in the golf industry that can help me out. But if not, as long as my wife is happy with her decision, I'll settle for brakes and MP3 players.

Swing 'til you're happy!

It's Not The Clubs, It's The Player.

What a huge, steaming pile of hypocritical bull excrement! I hear that statement a lot and it always made me wonder. I mean, I'm pretty sure if you give a pro a starter set he or she will still shoot well. My issue is the whole up selling when it comes to buying clubs. I also understand the sales people need to make a living too...but to what extent?

You never see a golf club ad or commercial showcasing it's bottom of the barrel clubs. It's always the pro they sponsor smashing the ball into outer space because they are swinging the newest product. Then there are some of the golf pro's that sell clubs out of their shops. Try to tell them you want to take up the game and are looking for an inexpensive set.

The next thing you know this guy has you trying out different clubs and measuring you for a custom set. I thought "it's not the clubs, it's the player..." Yeah but their answer to that is "You can grow into these clubs." What the f%$# does that mean? I bought a nice set a few years ago with the whole "growing into them" theory and guess what...I still suck. Grow into them...I got something to grow into them.

What I want to see is a tour pro walking down the fairway while his caddy is carrying his bag full of old rusty clubs because..."It's not the clubs." That would be the best to see Tiger bust out a 3-wood with duct tape on it or even Rory have an old tube sock as a head cover. Nonetheless, whether your clubs cost $100 or $1000 just get out there and have fun.

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!!

10 Questions with a Non-Golfer

Here at the Golf Stinks blog, we certaintly do our part in blaming the pro tours and the media for sending the wrong message about this fantastic sport.

And, while acknowledging the economy is a major factor, we still highlight things that the golf industry can do to help drive new people to the game (I'd normally add a link here to prove my point, but we've literally written so much, it will be easier for you to just look at our archive section in the right-hand sidebar).

That all being said, I thought it would be interesting to talk with a non-golfer about their perceptions of the sport. I wonder if many of the golf stereotypes are true? To that end, my brother-in-law happens to be in town and I know he's never played golf before.

Let's see what a 30-year-old non-golfer has to say about...well, golf:

Q: What type of person plays golf?
A: Retired. Retirees. And anybody else that has a lot of money and a lot of free time.

Interviewer's note: Why am I not surprised by this answer?

Q: Do you think a person has to be rich to play golf?
A: Maybe not rich, but you definitely have to have...It's an expensive hobby. Golf clubs aren't cheap. Courses aren't cheap. I think probably the cheapest thing about golf would be buying the balls.

Q: When someone mentions they play golf, what's the first thought that pops into your head?
A: I picture them in golf clothes - especially like those knickers and that hat with the poof on top.

Interviewer's note: I'm never telling anyone I play golf again.

Q: When you hear the name Tiger Woods, what comes to mind?
A: Sell-out. I think of all his merchandise, video games. I mean, I'm sure he's a good golfer and all, but his stuff is is everywhere.

Q: As a follow-up to that, what about the Tiger sex scandal?
A: It's no different than any other celeb...he was married; boinked around, blah, blah, blah...same old story.

Interviewer's note: Well put.

Q: OK, so we know you don't play golf. Have you ever held a club?
A: Yeah, at the mini golf course.

Q: So you've played mini golf - what are your impressions of that?
A: I like it. I have fond memories of hitting a ball off a couple of walls into a giant plastic castle.

Interviewer's note: This is why Caddyshack 2 sucked.

Q: You've mentioned you know the basic terms and rules in other sports like [American] football and baseball. Do you think you have a basic understanding of golf's terms and rules? Please elaborate.
A: Yeah. Get the ball in the hole in as few hits as possible and always play the ball where it lies.

Interviewer's note: "Always play the ball where it lies." At what point did we weekend golfers stop following the very fundamentals of this game? Be honest...

Q: Do you know what a birdie means in golf?
A: That's when you make it in the hole with ...[pause]... with one stroke fewer than par [looks at interviewer unsure of himself].

Interviewer: That's very good!
Non-Golfer: And I only know that from all the video games.
Interviewer: I see. The ones with Tiger Woods you mean?
Non-Golfer: Yeah [laughs].

Q: Do you think golf courses are a waste of natural resources and/or prime real estate?
A: No, because if a golf course fails, it can be easily converted into a very scenic park.

Interviewer's note: I'm totally going to use that answer.

Q: Would you ever consider taking up golf?
A: I have [thought about it], but I always figured it would be when I was older - when [I have] nothing to do and [I] need exercise.

Interviewer's note: So to this non-golfer, we're a bunch of old rich guys with nothing to do and who need exercise. Hmmmm. When you think about it, that pretty much hits every golf stereotype on the head. I think I should interview other non-golfers and see if the answers are similar. Till then...

Tiger Wins! Now How Long Will We Have To Hear About It?

He won. And for real this time. This time it wasn't just an over-abundance of highlights showing the third place finisher. This time it wasn't the media basically handing him the win after the second round. He actually won this time! And I gotta tell ya, I'm not looking forward to hearing about it.

I can picture it already. ESPN will be dropping to their knees (as usual) for Tiger. They can't wait to just ram it down our throats. As a matter of fact, I think I'm going to just avoid watching ESPN for the next couple of days. Well, outside of Monday Night Football of course.

But seriously, Friday night ESPN was already handing the tournament over to Tiger again! Do they understand there are four rounds to a golf tournament? Watching SportsCenter, I saw one of their sidebar stories state that Tiger had a "Big Lead" after the second round. So I stuck around to see how big it was. Three strokes. Really? Three strokes is considered a "Big Lead" halfway through a tournament?! Well, I guess when Tiger holds the lead it is. Even after the third round, when he lost the lead, it was still all Tiger high-lights. Zach Johnson was just an after thought.

Seriously, come on. When is that stuff gonna stop? People were growing tired of Tiger before his "transgressions." More were sick of him afterward. And now, even more are just sick and tired of him and the media who continues to just shove him down our throats! I know it's going to be all over ESPN, so the only saving grace I have is the NFL.

One place where ESPN has not lost any understanding is that the NFL comes before just about everything else. It comes before baseball. It comes before basketball. It comes before college sports (obviously this does not include World Series games or college championships and bowl games). And it certainly comes before golf. Of course, at the time of my writing, SportsCenter has yet to air. But if history is any indicator, Tiger's victory will not lead after a day an NFL Sunday. But, I can only hope.

However, could you imagine if this victory came outside of football season? I think I would physically choke on the coverage. Add another reason to the list that football is my favorite sport.

Swing 'til you're happy!

Rock n' Roll n'...Golf?

A good common denominator between music and golf would have to be tempo. Obviously, most songs have a tempo and it is up to the musician to master the whole timing thing. Same thing in golf; the game has its own rhythm and the players focus on their tempo and timing. Could that be the reason why some rockers are excellent golfers?

Now please understand, the term "rocker" can be misconstrued. I mean, a few years back, Golf Digest did a ranking of the top 100 musicians who golf and came up with Kenny G. as number 1 (0.6 handicap). Mr. G. might not personify the rock star ideology with his mighty sax but he's in the ball park, sort of.

If we want to talk about a rock star that golfs, I got one for you: Alice Cooper. This guy hits the course just as hard as he used to hit the bottle - at least six days a week. He's been quoted as saying golf saved his life from alcohol addiction. Moreso, how he replaced one addiction with another, referring to his love for golf. If you're wondering...he's a 2 handicap.

I never really thought rock stars and golf could co-exist. I figured courses would shy away from the whole rock star lifestyle. You know, the boozing, cursing, tight leather pants and breaking stuff...wait a minute, that sounds like a normal outing for me.

Hit'em long...yell FORE!!! Rock on!